sodomymcscurvylegs:

jadethemerman:

BYE

This will NEVER stop being funny!

suicunesrider:

I almost scrolled past this
I fucking almost scrolled past this

suicunesrider:

I almost scrolled past this

I fucking almost scrolled past this


Having none of your Lion bullshit today.

Having none of your Lion bullshit today.

splders:

*eats 4 slices of pizza*

im so full

*eats another 4 slices of pizza*

alltimechemicalkilljoy:

the-tv-light:

lookatthewords:

goatsy:

Reblog if your cramps have ever

  • made you vomit
  • lasted between 2-3 days
  • stopped you from being able to walk or run
  • made you cry

It’s not considered a viable excuse on any occasion, and I would like to know why.

add

  • woken you up at night the pain was so bad

also

  • made you pass out

don’t forget

  • made you unable to stand up without doubling over and grabbing onto the closest object for support
miketooch:

kangaroonemesis:

Im not sure the new IT guy knows what he is doing…

Nonsense give him a promotion and his own corner office

miketooch:

kangaroonemesis:

Im not sure the new IT guy knows what he is doing…

Nonsense give him a promotion and his own corner office

-annoying:

i want a hot body but i also want hot wings

I’m scared that I’m not myself in here, and I’m scared that I am.

fiftyshadesofmacygray:

It’s important to make friendships that are deeper than gossiping and drinking and smoking and going out.

Make friends who you can go get breakfast with, make friends you can cry with, make friends who support your life goals and believe in you.

turkeyinacan:

shoutout to people working weekends and overnights and overtime, people working in hospitality and retail and food service, who are sacrificing time with their loved ones, so fuckers with weekday desk jobs get to live comfortably with the amenities we provide while simultaneously shitting all over us for not getting “real jobs”

witziy:

mylittlebig-world-of-my-mind:

take-me-tom-hiddleston:

ship-it-all-the-way:

jadedfalling:

sickledsnake:

itsdorkgirl:


BOND is a tiny touch module. It can be a pendant or a bracelet but it comes in pairs. You keep one and you give one to a friend. When you touch it, your friend feels it. No matter where they are on the planet. We don’t do tweets, we do tickles.

gonna put it on my dick

THAT IS NOT THE INTENDED USE SIR

This is actually so cool because some people wear bracelets and necklaces and things as comfort items. I used to wear a necklace from my grandma to remind me of her and I would touch the pendant on it when I was feeling down or stressed. So imagine (if she were still alive), every time I did that she would know I was thinking of her, drawing strength from her.
And then imagine poking it and the other person feels it and pokes back and you end up in a real life facebook poke war.

I would send messages in morse code

magine you and your best friend have one. When the friend dies, he/she is buried with the bracelet. A couple weeks later, you feel someone touch your wrist.

Well this escalated from cool tech to perverted hilarity to something heartfelt then finally something out a creepypasta


I think a supernatural gif would look fine about now

witziy:

mylittlebig-world-of-my-mind:

take-me-tom-hiddleston:

ship-it-all-the-way:

jadedfalling:

sickledsnake:

itsdorkgirl:

BOND is a tiny touch module. It can be a pendant or a bracelet but it comes in pairs. You keep one and you give one to a friend. When you touch it, your friend feels it. No matter where they are on the planet. We don’t do tweets, we do tickles.

gonna put it on my dick

THAT IS NOT THE INTENDED USE SIR

This is actually so cool because some people wear bracelets and necklaces and things as comfort items. I used to wear a necklace from my grandma to remind me of her and I would touch the pendant on it when I was feeling down or stressed. So imagine (if she were still alive), every time I did that she would know I was thinking of her, drawing strength from her.

And then imagine poking it and the other person feels it and pokes back and you end up in a real life facebook poke war.

I would send messages in morse code

magine you and your best friend have one. When the friend dies, he/she is buried with the bracelet. A couple weeks later, you feel someone touch your wrist.

Well this escalated from cool tech to perverted hilarity to something heartfelt then finally something out a creepypasta

I think a supernatural gif would look fine about now

chicagno:

oh i think i will animals

chicagno:

oh i think i will animals

roryink:

nerdiegirlie:

when they were prepping me for the surgery the nurse put one of those cloth hats over my head to keep the hair out of my face

she said “here’s your party hat”

and i was already trippin balls so I said 

"yaAAY paaaarty"

and wiggled around on the table like a gleeful slug

i think about this post sometimes and it makes me grin like a dope